- Painty the Pirate: Ready for Christmas, kids?
- Kids: Aye-aye, Captain!
- Painty the Pirate: I can't hear you.
- Kids: [louder] Aye aye, Captain!
- Painty the Pirate: Oooooooooooooh...
- Bikini Bottom Chorus:
Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? SpongeBob SquarePants! Absorbent and yellow and porous is he SpongeBob SquarePants! If nautical nonsense be something you wish SpongeBob SquarePants! Then drop on the deck and flop like a fish SpongeBob SquarePants! SpongeBob SquarePants! SpongeBob SquarePants! SpongeBob SquarePants! It's the SpongeBob Time Machine Special! Time-Time-Time-Time-Time-Time-Time-Time!
[pan over streets in Bikini Bottom, then zoom into Spongebob's house. We see Spongebob, Patrick, Squidward, Mr. Krabs, Sandy, Gary, Planktion, Mrs. Puff, Pearl, Larry, Squilliam, King Neptune, Evelyn, Fred, Flatts, harold, Mable, Timmy, Nancy, Nat, Old Man Jenkins, Shubie, Tom, Spongebob's parents and grandma, Patrick's parents, his fake parents from I'm With Stupid, Squidward's mom, Betsy, Carl, Dale, Gunther Fitz, Granny, Mable, Sally. Girly Teengirl, Miss Shell, and sereval bikini bottomites go into the very large airplane time machine. Spongebob turns on the time machine.]
Spongebob: Let's see.... May 11, 1970 [types 05 in the month digit, 11 in the day digit, 1970 in the year digit] Ta-da! [Airplane moves and dissapears, It runs through the Park. Spongebob starts]
Patrick: Ooh! My Crime-Commit-inator! [zaps the Crime-Commit-inator at Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy] Yay! [Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy are in the hypno-state from Mermaidman vs Spongebob. We see Spongebob, Patrick, Squidward, Sandy, Gary, Planktion, Mrs. Puff, Pearl, Larry, Squilliam, Evelyn, Fred, Harold, Mable, Timmy, Nancy, Nat, Shubie, Tom, Gunther Fitz, Sally, and sereval bikini bottomites go into the very large airplane time machine.]
Old Man Jenkins: They left us here, Molly
Granny (Molly): What are we gonna do?
[the machine goes back to modern times]
Spongebob: Triton's Tonic! [Bikini Bottom is turned into Barnacle City, most places changed into different ones, all boats changed into real life cars, Barnacle City is LHD]
Patrick: Look! [sees the "Chauffeur Help Wanted/Volvo 940 Limo"]
[Spongebob drives the Volvo 940 Limo, which drives ]